Closing Billboard

Alryt!

It's exactly 11:10 pm in my phone's clock, 

and I still happen to be awake, typing my sem-ender blog! 

Yeah!

Honestly, I still can't believe that everything is through!

All those sleepless nights, stress, pressure, deadlines, programs, website, defense, project papers...

Everything! It just feels so good.. 

That after getting through all those, I am finally free! Haha!

I actually wanna hibernate. :(( But that'd be impossible.. Haha! Crazy huh? :))

Okay. So here's the thing.

If you have noticed, in my previous blog, I was too emotional. I mean really.. TOO emotional..

Well.. Good news! Haha! I am coping up, and I'm actually having a good time now :)

Special thanks to my close buddies.. They helped me get through with it..

And of course to my Bestfriend, Savior and Lord --> Jesus 

He was the only one who had completely picked me up and made me stronger and better :D

And this vacation, I'd really take time to reflect, regain all that has been lost so that when the new year comes, I'll be better for God, for my friends, for my family and for myself. :)

This 2nd trimester of the school year has been really huge for me..

I got involved in too many major school contests, productions, performances.. 

And I can say, I had the time of my life in all those shows.

I'm gonna miss it. I'm actually missin it right now. :))

There are so many people to thank.... And they're.......

My classmates! CS22 as we call ourselves, or 'Trupa'. 

They are one-of-a-kind! Haha!

Everyday, through thick and thin, we've been together..

And for almost a year, we still are together.. 

It's quite amazing how we get tighter as each day passes by..

And I am looking forward to another great year with them in 2011.. 

For sure, it's gonna be a great ride :))

My lifegroup family!

Wow! Although, we are just new in this group, 

I can say that they have welcomed us very warmly and we felt that... We belong.. haha!

We also got to meet many new friends.. And we are really thankful for getting to know them..

But I guess, what makes this lifegroup extraordinary is that, they always make sure that Christ is in the midst of everything that they do..

They reminded us of God's love, man's salvation through Jesus Christ, and that happiness can only be found in Him alone..

Especially Mam Jast, Sir JB and Mam Bell.. They are our second parents.. :)

And all those other orgs that I became part of...

English Guild, Music Synergy, Theatre Guild..

You made me into where I am now in EAC, and I hope that we could do more stuffs together in 2011..

Okay..

Enough with the drama.. Hahaha!

I just wanted to express my gratitude.. Although this blog ain't enough... 

But I hope... You somehow felt how thankful I am for having you guys.. :)

You made my 2nd semester more colorful and meaningful.. Yeah! Haha!

To tell you frankly,

Now that everything's over..

All I want is to..... 

Break freeee! Hahaha!

Well.. That started actually yesterday..

The whole day I was with my best trupa in freedom park.. 

Laughing at nonsense things... All we know is that we're having fun cuz we're together :)

While the whole night I was with Neil, Marlon and Champ..

I had a great time..

Just chattin, chillin, laughin, and sound trippin! Hahaha!

A great start to formally open my free days.. :)

And it's gonna be a month of being imprisoned at home..

Its gonna be hard adjusting.. And... Resting ofcourse! Haha!

But I have to make the most out of it..

Coz for sure, when 3rd sem comes, I'll long for it again.. :))

So..

This ends here..

Thanks for readin :)

Happy Holidays everybody!

Merry Christmas!

Happy New Year!

God bless you all :)

-kevin.gerard-

Eclipse

I actually don't know why I opened my blogsite, signed in, and clicked 'New Post'..

The whole day my group mates and I were busy finishing our COBOL programs, 

and honestly, I didn't have the mood to continue it right now..

There are still so many thoughts runnin' inside my head..

Questions.. Doubts.. Fears.. 

In short, there is an absence of PEACE.

This is actually the first time I felt this kind of feeling in my life.. 

The severe pain that kills me emotionally and causes my mind to think the whole day..

I need answers... Answers... =|

This crazy feeling started last Friday.. 

Alright. Stop. I won't continue.

Its hard suppressing the feelings inside..

I wanna be strong for myself, for other people..

I wanna show them that I'm fine..

I thought I could go on like this.. I thought I can still tolerate it..

As I've said in my previous blogs, I do not open my self to people that much.. 

I only choose 'em..

And sometimes, I hesitate to open myself up to these pips, cause I fear that they won't understand me..

But I guess, each person has their limits..

And I believe, that I've gone beyond my boundaries..

The whole day yesterday was the darkest day for me..

Most people didn't notice it, cause I tried my best to hide it.. 

But the feeling's weird..

But at the same time, I met my real friends...

Friends who'd be there for me at my weakest point...

And friends who really knew me.. 

They approached me, talked to me, and asked if everything was okay..

My world lit up cause of them.. 

Although the pain didn't totally go away, 

but somehow it made me feel lighter..

Until last night, a friend talked to me which greatly encouraged me.

He shared me this verse:

"My grace is sufficient for you for my power is made perfect in weakness. Therefore I will boast the more about my weaknesses, so that Christ's power may rest on me." 

- 2 Corinthians 12:9-10

I read the whole context, and the Lord reminded me of 2 things: 

GRACE & DEPENDENCE.

He reminded me to totally trust in Him and depend on Him at all times, cause no one else could be there for me in every moment of my life but Him. He told me that every circumstance is His plan for me to grow and be better and stronger..

And that made it better for me.. 

I prayed, talked to God and slept with peace..

Although the pain's still there.. But I'm tryin' to cope up..

I know this will take long but I know I'd soon get off from this plight..

And truly, no one beats my Jesus in comfortin' me in the midst of my struggles and picking me up for me to be stronger and ready to fight again...

-kevin.gerard-

10 Things I Wanna Say to Random Pips :)

Alright. Same with Sir JB and Champ, I'll be writing my '10 things' as well. :) 

This is gonna be fun. Haha! 

Try guessin' as you read the items one by one. :D

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1. All along you were with me. You never left my side. I just pray that I could remain faithful as you are to me. Sorry for all the things I've done. I promise to be better.

2. I did it before, I know. I know that I could not come back to the past and correct it. But I just hope that you would give me another chance to be rightful for you. And I promise, I won't do it again.

3. We were close before. You actually were my best friend. But you pushed people away. Including me. You isolated yourself and enjoyed the things in your new little world. I hope you're happy. 

4. You  made my college life a really good one. Although we're only at our 2nd year, but I found a family in you. Hope that we'll remain strong in spite of our indifferences and be one in all the things that we'd do.

5. I never thought that we'd get this close as we are now. I enjoy your company so much 'cause I can be myself whenever we're together. Hope you'd be with me, guarding me, as I walk with our Savior. 

6. You always make a big deal out of so little things. I wanna have the nerve to understand you. But it's just too hard for me. You're my friend okay? And I don't wanna feel this bitterness just because of that. I really don't like those who'd make a big deal out of things that are not meant to be argued or discussed. Change. And I'll change my perspective on you. Just like before.

7. I got distracted because of you! (Haha) Don't know why but the way you set your eyes on me just makes me melt. (Sheesh) But I wanna stop this now. It won't help me. Neither anybody. 

8. We've fancied so many things. We tried taking the steps that could lead to the fulfillment of our dreams. I enjoyed every step I took with you all. Hope that it'd last. 

9. I don't know what's your problem. Okay I get it, you're an achiever. But I tell you it's nothing if I would base it in your personality. I can't get your point of always being in a competition with me. You think I don't notice it huh? I only smile at you whenever you point these things out. Cause I know that I'd only waste my time arguing with you. But still, I hope you'd change. Not only for me, but for all the people you've caused deep pain. Tsss.

10. You made me into the person where I am right now. :)

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There are 4 numbers in which I do not pertain only to a single person. Haha! 

The numbers? Secret. Hehe. :))

Thanks for your time readin it. :D

-kevin.gerard-

11:02.12/05/10

Hey guys! 

Kevin here at Blogspot.. 

Welcome to my page. :D

It's been a while since I've thought of creating one.

Frankly, I got inspired by my friend, Champ, a great blogger. :)

I've read his blogs and I also thought of having mine.

Thanks man! 

Okay.. So where do I start?

Hmmm..

Probably I'll just start of by introducing myself since this is my first blog ever..

Okay. 

My name is Kevin. 

I got so many nicknames so no need for enumerating them. Haha!

I'm the youngest in the family. I live in San Juan. I'm 18 years old. 

Jesus Christ is my Savior and Lord. And He is also actually my one and only true bestfriend :)

Well.. Why do I thought of writing blogs?

Honestly, I like speaking my mind.

I like speaking my mind to those people who could understand me and who got the willingness to listen.

But to those people whom I could see and feel no interest of the stories I'd like to share, I'm telling ya, I won't share anything to them ever. Haha! :)) 

Not that its friendship over or something, its just that I won't be that open to them anymore. :) 

Talkin 'bout friendship,

For me, friends shouldn't be there only when you're happy. 

Actually that isn't a true test of friendship.

You'd get to know your real friends when they're still around you no matter how indifferent you may get and would be with you even to the depths of your struggles. 

That's my criteria in looking for my real friends.

I'm not actually open to what I really feel publicly. 

I only choose those people whom I could trust and tell them my innermost thoughts and emotions. Yeah. I choose people whom I would talk to. :) 

Don't know why, but that's me. And to others, I'll be as neutral as I could get. :)

'BEHIND THE SCENES'. 

Why 'Behind the Scenes'? Haha!

I actually look at my life as a PERFORMANCE.

I'm the performer, of course. And everything around me is the stage, lights, the crowd, the set...

And my personal life is the Backstage.

For me, life could be as wonderful as it could be if you would choose to make the most out of it and would be willing to submit unto God's will. 

If you would put into mind that everyday can be your last performance on Earth, you would not hesitate living as if it is your last. 

And just like in a performance, in life, you can't please everybody. 

There are those who'd hate you, there are those who'd love and support you. 

But either way, I will choose to love those people. 

They're the ones who'd make me a better and stronger person. 

And lastly, the outcome of your performance is up to God. 

No matter how awful or awesome it could get, God still made it to happen and He has the reason for everything :)

And getting through the backstage can be very risky. Its quite tough exposing your personal life to people. That is why like what I've said earlier, I only choose these pips. But this blogsite is a glimpse that I could give y'all to my backstage :) In here  I promise that I'd express the things that I would like to share. Of course, only those, I believe, appropriate. :))

So I think that's much of it.

Hope you'd be there again reading my next blogsss. Yeah. I meant blogssss. Haha!

I enjoyed pouring my heart out though this is the first.

See y'all again :)

-kevin.gerard-

PS. I also invite you guys to ask me in my Formspring Account. Haha! 

http://www.formspring.me/kevincandole

Ask me anything. I'd answer it as honestly as I can. :)